Thank you for all your well-wishes and questions about Ivy. We’re now three months into legal issues and all I can say is that despite working closely with the commissioner for two years and treating her with kindness and compassion and with honesty and truth driving all my actions  – the commissioner issued a Cease and Desist one week before release (all the books were in the bookstores) and two days before the joint book launch. I can’t lie, I feel betrayed and disappointed. But I keep uppermost in my mind my good intentions in agreeing to write the book: exposing the patriarchal and draconian policies and attitudes of the day that punished our most vulnerable citizens. Those beliefs and behaviours led to half a million people being treated so badly, they forced a government to issue multiple apologies. And despite what is currently happening, the book was written, published, and those who read copies were impressed with the message it delivered. Nothing can take away the pride I feel at achieving my goal.

So, I continue on, focusing on the good.

In the meanwhile, I completed Maud & Calean, which explores intergenerational trauma – told by a ghost in purgatory (so yes, he did bad things when he lived) which was entered into the ASA/HQ competition in late January. And I applied for two funding grants to illustrate The Mystery of the Missing Voices, the middle-grade graphic novel I wrote for my thesis (which scored 77%), written for children living with domestic and family violence (DFV). And I’m close to completing the zillionth edit of Own My Mistakes in preparation to enter the Allen & Unwin crime fiction competition next month.

My experiences of growing up with DFV and child sexual assault (CSA)

are the reason I continue with Own My Mistakes, rather than putting it in a box under my bed. It’s a hard slog, but one I want to put out there. Even if it stops one victim from being groomed, then it’s done its job. These topics are so important, as the death rate of men killing their partners climbs. We’re only a quarter of the way through the year, and it looks like it’s going to be another record-breaking one.

I believe by keeping DFV and CSA taboo topics in the media and elsewhere, we’re allowing these perpetrators free reign. I mean, if we’re too afraid to talk about these issues, what action are we going to take? It’s like a societal dissociation when it comes to such subjects. And I know. I have entered numerous competitions which claim to be airing women’s topics with short stories or memoir extracts and guess what – I never even long list. One judge’s feedback stated the entry was well written, hitting all the right markers, but ‘please change the topic’! But I believe with each of my entries – on the topics of DFV and CSA – I’m making it easier for the next generation of writers to bring light to these matters.

We need to expose these men – and yes, women commit these crimes as well, but with less than 10% statistically (it’s the men who kill and violently) – by ensuring these topics become everyday conversations. Not one that issues numbers that mean nothing to many of us.

But things are changing. I attended What She Said a couple of weeks ago.

An event that took a year to put together by dedicated people. It was an amazing celebration of womanhood. And the proceeds of the event were donated to Mid-Western People Against Violence – an organisation that supports women and children (the silent victims) escaping DFV. The actors, singers, writers, coordinators, directors and all the behind the scenes contributors dedicated innumerable hours to put the show together for free!

So, despite the depressing news, there is good happening all around. We must focus on that and keep supporting those who see a brighter future, because it’s only while we’re uplifted that we stay strong. Don’t let the bastards get you down because that’s when they win!